Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Attack of Scarabaeidia aka The Kenyan Dung Beetle

Scarabaeidia aka Kenyan Dung Beetle

Tucked deep inside the latest massive appropriations bill and almost hidden among the thousands of pork barrel request is an obscure item which few have noticed. This item is simply labeled "Importation of Scarabaeidia". Few if any members of Congress read these bills, as they delegate these unimportant matters to staffers. It seems that representative I. C. Feces, a junior republican congressman from the sovereign state of Alabama managed to slip this small request into this enormous trillion dollar bill. The cost of this pork barrel project is a measly $3,000,000 dollars, a mere drop in the bucket by congressional standands. This request calls for the importation of some three million Scarabaeidia, which comes to a cost of a dollar each, seemingly a bargain. When asked my a curious reporter why these Scarabaeidia were being imported Rep. I.C. Feces replied that he intended to take the little creatures to Washington and turn them loose near the Capital and White House as the amount of crap coming out of both was endangering the health of the nation. Shocked the reporter asked what the Scarabaeidia could do about that, Rep. I.C. Feces laughed and replied, "the Scarabaeidia, aka Kenyan Dung Beetle is the best shit-eater in the world having developed a voracious appetite for it in his native Kenya"!
by Ron Russell

No comments: